Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
