I don't think brook has ever known best
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Randomize
