how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
