is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
