So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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