Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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