your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize
