I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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