There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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