I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
