hotel room ftw
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize