omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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