dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
