it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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