You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
