i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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