We need to rekindle our bromance
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
third nipple confirmed
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
