oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
