i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize