me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
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