She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
