I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
