my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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