I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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