i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize