did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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