I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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