Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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