he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
