Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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