new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
