I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize
