I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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