You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
