Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
She announced her abortion via fbk
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
