does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
