Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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