she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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