Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
