seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
