he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Randomize
