I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
