worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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