Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize