I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
