I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
