Will you blow on my dice?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize