During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
just found out that she named her cat after me.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
