ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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