69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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