hotel room ftw
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
