Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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